Being skinny.

In the past week, several people have remarked to me that I look "skinny." I was partially taken aback by these comments because I haven't necessarily noticed it myself, but then again I probably don't look in the mirror more than once a day really. I have noticed that my pants are too big, but this was more of an annoyance because I don't have time to go shopping anymore. So yes, I guess I am losing weight, although I have done very little to try to do so besides carrying my kids around all the time and attending an Pop Physique class every once in a blue moon.

I've never thought of myself as "skinny" and having been called this a few times now, I felt like it was such a foreign label for my body. I have always been kinda curvy for an Asian woman. I am not embarrassed that I have hips and boobs, and while every woman desires to be thinner, I have always been pretty comfortable in my body even in those seasons when I ate a little too much Korean BBQ. Even now at eight months, there are clearly hormonal changes still going on because C is nursing less often than she used to. I've noticed these past few weeks that my hair is shedding less and I am getting pimples again. Probably the best side effect of pregnancy was having really clear skin. Oh well. They say that it takes about as long to lose the postpartum weight as pregnancy, so we're close. But I thought to myself - I'm still in the postpartum season? It takes SO long to just be normal again!

And while many women would love to be called skinny, I can't help but feel like in some respects I could care less. Because while I want to look and feel good (who doesn't?) I have little choice but to put myself and my own needs last now and it's surprising that during all the times that I wanted to lose weight in my life, the one time where I don't really care quite as much it just happens. (Thank you, breastfeeding.) Funny how that is.

End Day 16.