Prayers for my babies

At church on Sunday, I saw the most beautiful thing. The couple in front of me brought their 2 year old in with them for the musical part of the worship service. As the mom sang along with the music, she brought her hand up as a reflection of her worship to God. Her husband was holding their son, and as he saw his mom's hand come up, he did the same. Standing behind them, this sight was so poignant to me that I started crying right away. As I've struggled with feelings of being scared, overwhelmed, and uncomfortable during this pregnancy, I've been looking for places in which God would confirm for me the call to mothering yet another little one. This image of mother and son worshiping together in front of me seemed to say everything about what it really means to be a parent.

Kids are such amazing emulators. They learn everything by watching us and observing all our habits even when we are unaware of their gaze. And just as Elisa has learned to brush her teeth, eat with a spoon, and do anything else by imitating us, so she will learn from us what we worship, how we worship, and why we worship. A few weeks ago at church, I was praying and saw the most beautiful image of her worshiping God and it nearly broke my heart with desire. I realized that there is almost nothing I want more in life than for my kids to know Jesus and be saved. I felt an urgency to pray for the baby in my belly, not just that he would be healthy and safe, but that above all, that God would reach him, touch him, love him, and save him.

In those two moments, I understood motherhood in a different way - that my role is not only caretaker, nurturer, comforter, provider, but also teacher, mentor, sister, discipler. And though it will be awhile before either of our kids will go through tough questions about faith or even basic Bible stories with total comprehension, it is never too early to start practicing the latter types of roles in my everyday life, which is so hard because the most basic tasks of motherhood are so completely all-consuming. There will always be dirty dishes, laundry to fold, toys to clean up, and diapers to change, but I'm praying that God would give me energy to go beyond all that and be able to shepherd both of these little blessings in His ways.